out_there: B-Day Present '05 (Default)
[personal profile] out_there
Well, since Dana asked...

Title: Boredom
Fandom: Crossing Jordan
Pairing: Well, it's more preslash than slash, but it's still a Nigel and Bug snippet.
Notes: This was written ages ago (like, close to a year ago) so it's sort of S1-ish. And, before you ask, I had to check the official website for the correct spelling of their names.

***

"What are you doing?"

"Hmmm..." Nigel was bent over the computer desk, staring at the screen. He spun around in the computer chair with glee, "Is there some way in which my wonderful expertise can assist you?"

Bug shook his head. "No. Seriously, what are you researching? As far as I was aware, the only case left was the Anderson heart attack. It looked fairly simple."

"It was. I finished it this morning." A crestfallen Nigel swung back around to the computer screen. "The family's been contacted, the body will be collected in the morning."

"Oh." There was a moment of silence. "So, what are you doing?" Bug dragged over his own chair, and joined his fellow bored co-worker beside the computer.

"I'm looking myself up on the internet."

"How?"

"The simple act of typing 'Nigel Townsend' into each search engine and following the results."

"Why?"

Nigel shrugged. "There's nothing else to do. We've had four tediously simple cases..."

"Heart attack, cancer, diabetes and heart attack." Bug counted them out on his fingers, then ticked them off again, stating, "Funeral parlour, crematorium, cemetery, waiting to be collected tomorrow."

"And so, I'm bored." Nigel declared with a brief wave towards the screen.

"Autopsy reports all completed?"

"Yep."

"And the families are contacted..." Bug straightened suddenly. "What about Jordan? She's always working on something."

"Left early."

"How come?"

"Nothing to do. If she's needed, Dr Macy will call her back in. Otherwise, there's no point in us all sitting around doing nothing."

"And Dr. Macy's catching up on admin work, right?"

"Got it in one." Nigel sighed, and the pair stared at the glaring screen. "Basically, there's nothing to do and an hour of the afternoon to fill."

"Oh... Did you find anything interesting?" Bug listlessly inquired, gesturing to the computer.

"Not really. A few books on the Grand Prix, an online art gallery, and a Missouri Indoor Race Track results. I did find out that one Nigel Townsend achieved A levels in Maths and Physics during 1975 at Dunsmore School for Boys."

"I take it that wasn't you."

Nigel flicked the screen to the Dunsmore reunion page. "A public school in Warwickshire? Not likely."

"This barely counts as filling time... Anything else of even mild interest?"

"Even mild, almost non-existent interest would be welcome at this point. And probably too much to hope for." He clicked on another page, and came across a large picture.

"Nigel Townsend and Alan Bromage of London, England receive the NOVA Award Statue from CIF Chairman Roger Lane as innovators of the Lock-Up Device." Bug read from the screen. "Well, that definitely wasn't you."

Nigel turned from the screen to watch Bug, "I'm wondering if I should be insulted by that comment."

"Probably. But I was actually referring to the photo. You'd never be mistaken for him."

"Probably?" Nigel inquired, narrowing his eyes.

"Well, I don't think you'd ever win a prize as an 'innovator'..."

"I'll have you know, I have been known to be very innovative."

"But would you call your invention the 'Lock-Up Device'?"

"Well, you do have a point there," Nigel admitted as he turned back to the screen.

"Exactly," Bug smugly agreed. "So, you have no interesting sites. What about me?"

"No." Nigel didn't even look up from the computer.

"What do you mean 'no'?" Bug sounded vaguely offended.

"I mean, 'no' as in 'no, there are no interesting, or even excruciatingly boring, sites about you'."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Already tried. No sites."

"Using 'Bug' gave no hits?" Bug asked sceptically. "Let me do it."

"If it's not on your birth certificate, it's not your name. Looking up nicknames is cheating."

"How can it be cheating if there's no rules? This isn't even a sport."

Nigel was adamant. "It's still cheating. You can't do it. Have to use your actual name."

Bug looked warily at Nigel. "You can't spell my actual name, can you?"

"Yes, I can."

"Prove it."

"How?"

Bug passed him a sheet of paper and a pen. "Write it."

"Fine." After a few moments of writing, Nigel passed the paper back to Bug, his untidy scribble spelling out 'Mahesh Vijayaraghavensatyanaryanamurthy'.

Bug looked over it a few times. "Okay, you can spell it."

"But I'm willing to bet that learning to write your name in elementary school was a lot easier for me," Nigel said, smirking.

"Being smug will not win you friends, Nigel," was Bug's reprimanding reply.

"But it does help stave off the boredom."

They both turned as Dr. Macy entered the room, stating, "We've got another body."

With one shared look between them, they replied in unison. "Thank heavens."

***
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