SN Fic and Hornblower Rec
Jul. 19th, 2004 12:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
out_thereFirst of all, Celli, I gave you the link to the story without slash. The slashy version of that fic is here and the porny sequel here.
Secondly, you know I said that Pellew's lines about being becalmed made me want to write Danny fic. I finished it off. It's *rough*, *very* rough, and I don't know if the non-dialogue form works or not. But, yes. It's below.
***
Becalmed
It was something that happened after seeing Abby. Something that Dan couldn't quite explain, so he didn't try.
Dana and Natalie were happy that he didn't go off on crazy tandents any more. Jeremy was nervous enough that he didn't notice it. Isaac just seemed pleased, and said, "It's good to see you... less jumpy, Daniel." When he got sudden news that Peter and Paul were held up, Casey griped and complained. Dan just nodded and did the show, and then started helping Sally with the scripts.
It wasn't that he didn't love the show. He did. It was just that... he didn't seem to have the energy to get excited about it anymore. He was floating along, as still as painted boat upon a painted sea.
Abby said that it was natural, normal. That it was just part of the process, a stage that he needed to go through. It was 're-evaluating', apparently. Dan wondered if it was just an example of what he'd be without his past. If Sam hadn't died like that; if Dan hadn't spent the last ten years trying to compensate for his loss, trying to drown out the guilt; maybe this would have been his life. Just floating from one thing to another, not really caring about anything, not really trying.
It should have been a depressing thought, but it was just... a thought. He wasn't upset by it, he wasn't pleased by it. It was just something to think about before he stood up and went on with the next part of his day.
Elliot was the first one to ask about it, to ask if there was anything wrong. Dan replied that he was just feeling under the weather. He'd be fine tomorrow.
Later, Kim asked and he shrugged it off, asking about her date last night.
Then Natalie asked, and then Jeremy. And a few days later, Dana asked. A few days after that, Isaac approached him, saying, "If you need the time off, you know you can have it." Dan shook away their concern and kept doing the show.
Casey was the last to ask, which seemed rather appropriate. Casey wasn't a touchy-feely guy. He believed in sharing only when it wasn't important, only when it was done for pure attention-seeking. Actually opening up because you were hurting, because you were angry and frightened and lost? Thankfully, that wasn't something Casey did.
Casey cornered him in their office, and asked the typical questions. Are you okay? Is anything wrong? And Dan recited the answers that everyone wanted to hear: I'm fine; nothing to worry about; just didn't sleep so well last night; feel like I'm coming down with something.
Casey gave him a long look, and leaned closer to him on the couch. Casey's hand was warm and solid on Dan's shoulder as Casey pointed out that he'd been like this for weeks. That something was wrong, and he needed to know why Dan was acting like this.
Dan shrugged and told the truth. Said the three words that had never helped anyone: I don't know.
Casey's reply was too familiar: Danny, I'm worried about you; this isn't good, this isn't healthy; this isn't you... Dan closed his eyes, just a little tired and let Casey keep talking. He had nothing to say, so he waited for the speech to finish.
Casey imploringly said his name, and he had to respond. Had to plaster on a smile he didn't feel, and tell Casey what he'd told Jeremy. I'm fine, and Abby says I'm fine. It's just a stage. Nothing to worry about.
Casey did what he expected him to do. He got up and left. Dan sat there, not surprised, not really caring, and wondered which shows they were using for the next night. Made a few notes on them before heading home.
When he got to his apartment, Casey was waiting outside his door, leaning against the golden numbers that proclaimed Dan's address as 16B. Dan didn't want to hear Casey playing the concerned friend role again, so he started reciting his excuses quickly. A phase. I'm fine. Need a good night's sleep. Casey just watched him with this sad look, then took Dan's shoulders in his hands and leaned forward.
Casey's lips on his were summer sunshine, warm and sweet. He kissed like a breath of fresh air, his tongue dragging across Dan's mouth like the tide, pulling him closer like the gentlest rip. Casey's hand crept up, curling around his neck, his thumb trailing over Dan's jaw. All Dan could think was that he didn't want this to stop, that it felt too good. Too warm. Too perfect. Too right.
Dan laughed, just because he wanted to let this suddenly happiness fly, and Casey's replying smile was a fresh wind in his sails. "Stay the night," Dan said. Casey nodded, and Dan lead him inside, finally knowing where he wanted to go.
The End
***
And, finally, it's somehow 12.30am, so I'm going to sleep. Night, all!
Secondly, you know I said that Pellew's lines about being becalmed made me want to write Danny fic. I finished it off. It's *rough*, *very* rough, and I don't know if the non-dialogue form works or not. But, yes. It's below.
***
Becalmed
It was something that happened after seeing Abby. Something that Dan couldn't quite explain, so he didn't try.
Dana and Natalie were happy that he didn't go off on crazy tandents any more. Jeremy was nervous enough that he didn't notice it. Isaac just seemed pleased, and said, "It's good to see you... less jumpy, Daniel." When he got sudden news that Peter and Paul were held up, Casey griped and complained. Dan just nodded and did the show, and then started helping Sally with the scripts.
It wasn't that he didn't love the show. He did. It was just that... he didn't seem to have the energy to get excited about it anymore. He was floating along, as still as painted boat upon a painted sea.
Abby said that it was natural, normal. That it was just part of the process, a stage that he needed to go through. It was 're-evaluating', apparently. Dan wondered if it was just an example of what he'd be without his past. If Sam hadn't died like that; if Dan hadn't spent the last ten years trying to compensate for his loss, trying to drown out the guilt; maybe this would have been his life. Just floating from one thing to another, not really caring about anything, not really trying.
It should have been a depressing thought, but it was just... a thought. He wasn't upset by it, he wasn't pleased by it. It was just something to think about before he stood up and went on with the next part of his day.
Elliot was the first one to ask about it, to ask if there was anything wrong. Dan replied that he was just feeling under the weather. He'd be fine tomorrow.
Later, Kim asked and he shrugged it off, asking about her date last night.
Then Natalie asked, and then Jeremy. And a few days later, Dana asked. A few days after that, Isaac approached him, saying, "If you need the time off, you know you can have it." Dan shook away their concern and kept doing the show.
Casey was the last to ask, which seemed rather appropriate. Casey wasn't a touchy-feely guy. He believed in sharing only when it wasn't important, only when it was done for pure attention-seeking. Actually opening up because you were hurting, because you were angry and frightened and lost? Thankfully, that wasn't something Casey did.
Casey cornered him in their office, and asked the typical questions. Are you okay? Is anything wrong? And Dan recited the answers that everyone wanted to hear: I'm fine; nothing to worry about; just didn't sleep so well last night; feel like I'm coming down with something.
Casey gave him a long look, and leaned closer to him on the couch. Casey's hand was warm and solid on Dan's shoulder as Casey pointed out that he'd been like this for weeks. That something was wrong, and he needed to know why Dan was acting like this.
Dan shrugged and told the truth. Said the three words that had never helped anyone: I don't know.
Casey's reply was too familiar: Danny, I'm worried about you; this isn't good, this isn't healthy; this isn't you... Dan closed his eyes, just a little tired and let Casey keep talking. He had nothing to say, so he waited for the speech to finish.
Casey imploringly said his name, and he had to respond. Had to plaster on a smile he didn't feel, and tell Casey what he'd told Jeremy. I'm fine, and Abby says I'm fine. It's just a stage. Nothing to worry about.
Casey did what he expected him to do. He got up and left. Dan sat there, not surprised, not really caring, and wondered which shows they were using for the next night. Made a few notes on them before heading home.
When he got to his apartment, Casey was waiting outside his door, leaning against the golden numbers that proclaimed Dan's address as 16B. Dan didn't want to hear Casey playing the concerned friend role again, so he started reciting his excuses quickly. A phase. I'm fine. Need a good night's sleep. Casey just watched him with this sad look, then took Dan's shoulders in his hands and leaned forward.
Casey's lips on his were summer sunshine, warm and sweet. He kissed like a breath of fresh air, his tongue dragging across Dan's mouth like the tide, pulling him closer like the gentlest rip. Casey's hand crept up, curling around his neck, his thumb trailing over Dan's jaw. All Dan could think was that he didn't want this to stop, that it felt too good. Too warm. Too perfect. Too right.
Dan laughed, just because he wanted to let this suddenly happiness fly, and Casey's replying smile was a fresh wind in his sails. "Stay the night," Dan said. Casey nodded, and Dan lead him inside, finally knowing where he wanted to go.
The End
***
And, finally, it's somehow 12.30am, so I'm going to sleep. Night, all!
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no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 08:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 02:15 pm (UTC)It *feels* really rough, so I think it needs some harsh editing, but I'm so glad the basic idea works!
no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 06:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 06:31 pm (UTC)Thank you. I understand your issues with that. Even when the guys are hurting and being bitchy, they're still funny.
My concern was the lack of dialogue. For me, SN is a show all about the dialogue, the rhythm and flow of the words, so it's hard to try to write a fic that's basically silent and make it still feel like the SN characters we know and love.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 08:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-18 09:02 pm (UTC)I was wary of it when I posted (and anything finished at midnight should always be treated with a bit of wariness), but... *nods* Am reassured now.
The lack of dialogue really works, because it highlights this feeling that Dan is stuck, stalled, out of step, and so forth.
*nods* Out of the Casey/Danny banter rhythm, certainly. I'm intrigued that Casey doesn't actually have any direct dialogue. The only people who speak are Danny (at the end) and Isaac. How interesting that Isaac, in-control and effective Isaac, is still the one that Dan "hears"...
And now, I should stop looking at this fic like it's someone elses, and trying to find the deeper meanings. *g*